Debt Sematary 2k9

by Wells

I don’t know if you realize it, but I’m not drinking booze right now. For real, I’m sober. Dry. And, yeah, it’s not a lot of fun.

See, I’m paying off my debt. By 2k9 I’ll have paid off my credit card (little bit of debt there) and my student loan (bigger chunk of debt). I’m in the middle of a high-stakes battle against all the government and corporate fuckers that think they own me, and I’m going to win. I’m so committed to winning that I’ve promised not to drink any alcohol until the debts are paid in full.

I’ve done something similar to this before. Last year I renounced the sauce to pay off another credit card bill, and it worked. Not only do I save nearly $60 a week by not drinking, but my insatiable thirst for booze drives me to save maniacally. As they say, I’ve harnessed the beast that is my alcoholism and I’m using its ineffable power for good instead of evil.

So far I’ve learned that saving money isn’t really very hard, but it is really very boring. I used to pack a lunch occasionally to change things up or when spending $8 on a salad 5 days a week seemed just too ridiculous. Now I’m packing a lunch every day. People who pack lunches will espouse the virtues of delighting in your own healthy culinary prowess. Those people are full of shit. I’m packing rice and beans, or pasta with garlic butter, or bland-ass tuna sandwiches every day. It’s not that I can’t cook; I just haven’t got the time. If you love me and you see me on the street, buy me an exotic meal.